I will give up on the following things: 1) Friends who initiate plans, and not only flake out, but don't bother to give any reason as to why - if you don't have it in you to at least apologize, then you're not the kind of person i want to call a friend. 2) Golf in 2005- It was one of my years goals to take 10 strokes off my game, but i am so inconsistant, haven't really made any strides to improve my game at all, and all together fed up with the amount of money wasted on golf balls and green fees where i don't even enjoy myself. 3) Trying to explain how my antisocial behaviour is in no way directly related to my friends or people in my social circle - i've tried to explain myself many times and if you still don't get it, then you will believe what you want to believe. Now, to replace these things are the following: 1) Writing a "chapter" or entry into the novel that has been writing itself in my mind for the past 2 years - Nothing but laziness and lack of motivation kept me from doing this, so i am now being proactive with this persuit. 2) Job searching - no more settling for part time crap when i know i'm worth more 3) there isn't a 3rd thing, but i'll find something. I have a headache right now and i'm trying to figure out the origin of it. I get these headaches periodically but there isn't really any specific pattern. I remember one time in elementary school the headache was so bad, i think i was in grade 7 at the time, and during recess i had a horrible pain on one side of my head that just made me feel so bad that i had to just sit against the fence with my eyes closed. Then. when we were back in class, the headache was still there and i remember how difficult it was for me to write anything down that the teacher wanted us to, so i just put my head down on the edge of the desk and tried to write but this headache had just made it impossible for me to write neatly. I told my doctor about it and told me it was nothing. Since then, i get these headaches that hit right at the top of my eye socket, usually over one eye (right now it's predominantly the right eye) and it's just like someone is tightening a screw in that particular spot too tight. Is it dehydration? Is it fatigue? i dunno. all i know is it sucks and i want it to go away. I have one of those "magic bags" that can be frozen or heated in the microwave depending on your ailment, but i find that right now it's too cold and it was giving me more of a headache than helping. This weekend had a lot of highs and lows for me. Saturday night i got stood up, and have yet to hear a reason. I was steaming for about an hour, and started to write a really angry blog entry, but then, my best friend calls who just returned from a trip to Japan, and it made me calm down a lot. I would say it takes a lot to get me riled up. It takes very little actually when i think about it. The amount of things i am passive about is a list that i would like to think is quite long, but the little things here and there really irk me. My top 3 reasons are: 1) Being left in the dark about something especially if it relates to me2) Someone who makes assumptions about me3) Being second guessed in my moral beliefs and my actions Recently i got so worked up about someone just bringing up the topic of an incident i had last year, regarding her making an assumption about me based on my action. (The short version is she called me pretentious). It's things like this, like the nonsense comment left by an anonymous person in my blog, that just push my buttons. I go through life trying to give people the benefit of the doubt, so when people don't do that for me, i get upset. I can recall only getting that mad about stuff in this regard just last month, and then 4 years ago. I don't get mad about much, but i'm not a pushover either. I just pick my battles.

Source: The Pebble Says...