So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12 (NIV)

Ive been doing that all my life and it doesnt work. The problem is that other people dont want to be treated the way I would want them to treat me. Can you imagine how pissed my wife would be if I treated her the way I wanted her to treat me? I like to be left alone and want conversations kept to the bear essentials. I also like to be told when I make a mistake so that I can fix it next time.

Here is a great example...

Unfortunately I didnt learn good eating habits growing up. High blood-pressure, diabeties, heart conditions, etc. are all problems for our family and I now see these things as potential realities in my own life. Ive given my wife authority to hold me accountable in this area of my life but unfortunately she has not been very helpful. She is a horrible coach. She is too kind and considerate and never pushes me. Ive tried for years to get her to ride my ass about it and provide some motivation, but it is difficult for her since it is not how she would want to be treated. She just can't bring her self to say the words "no pain...no gain". She on the other hand has great self-descipline and doesnt need or want a coach. She is a vegetarian, can easily stop half way through a plate of food, drinks carrot juice for breakfast and to make matters worse she even reads even her bible every night (DAMMIT!). Recently she had a breakthrough. Im not sure if she finally realized that she could criticize me without hurting my feelings or if maybe it was because we mistakenly left the lights on while making love and the sad reality of my growing love handles finally sank in or maybe she found out I was at risk for diabeties and had to start measuring my blood sugar levels with one of those little finger pricking machines. Whatever the case, she somehow realized she might want to help. She actually raised her voice the other day and gave me her best Knute Rockne speech while she ripped a bag of chips out of my hands. It was great! I finally felt like she cared about me and I think she actually enjoyed it once she knew I appreciated her efforts!

It was a breakthrough moment for me as I realized that I should NOT be treating people the way I wanted them to treat me. I can think of dozens of encounters in my past with friends that didn't seem to work out right even though I had the best intentions. There have been times that I tried to motivate people that didn't want to be motivated, times that I left someone alone when they probably wanted to talk, and times that I tried to offer solutions to someone that didn't think there was even a problem. It is just not as simple as this Bible verse makes it seem. I guess I actually have to dig a little deeper and find out what people really want.